Devotional 3-22-12

As I began to think about the scripture readings for this the fifth week of Lent my mind kept going back to the passage from Jeremiah 31:31-34.  Here Jeremiah shares with us the difference between the earlier covenant God made with the people of Israel, the one written on tablets of stone, and the new covenant that God will make Israel and through them on down to us today.  This new covenant Jeremiah shares will be written in their minds and on their hearts.  Jeremiah tells us it will no longer be something external.  It is to be incorporated into the fiber of our being. That was and is a new thing that God has done. 

As a child I liked going to Sunday school at the small Methodist Church in the rural community where we lived.  I have to admit that I don’t recall though staying for the preaching service very often.  Between the ages of seven and thirteen my world was shaken by the deaths of several family members including a sister, a brother and my mother. 

I still recall climbing the hill behind our home and looking down at the valley below.  From my vantage point I was able to watch the occasional car going along the roadway.  It was lonely but it was also safe sitting there detached from the activities around me.  I recall making a vow to God to never to allow anyone to get close to me again because loosing loved ones hurt so much.  Looking back on it now I realize this was my way of recording my vow on stone to avoid further loss from broken relationships.

The summer of my thirteenth year I received a scholarship to attend 4-H camp. Among the various activities held each day was our vesper service conducted by the older 4-H campers.   I came to look forward to those evening vespers. There was warmth and a sense of Christian community present I had never experienced before.  I began to wonder, could they really care about me?  Could they sense my feelings of self-imposed isolation? And if they did, what difference would it make?  It would be two years yet before I came to understand that God loved even me.  

Our little church was having a revival and I was invited to attend by a younger neighbor boy.  I felt drawn to the altar rail and on the third evening, my Sunday school teacher and an older teen asked, would you like us to go forward with you?  I answered yes and in doing so I experienced a depth of love I had never known before.  I was surrounded by love that night and it filled my heart with warmth and a sense of joy that defies words.  It was more than the love demonstrated by our congregation.  It was the assurance that God loves me.  I had sung the song “Jesus Loves Me” as a child and I knew all the proper words, now that assurance is in my heart.  That stone tablet continues to surface in my life from time to time haunting me, trying to pull me back into my self-imposed shell, but its effects continue to lessen with time.

My life began to change after that.  No, things did not suddenly fall into place.  There have been many obstacles to overcome and more of them than I care to admit were of my own doing.  But through it all I have been blest to share with others that God both loves and cares for them.  I still have issues of knowing and being known by others.  I guess that will always be an issue for me even though I know and continue to experience wanting to share the love God has placed in my heart with others.

Prayer:  Gracious Lord, thank you for your never ending love that seeks us out time and time again.  Help us this day to open our hearts fully to you and to share the warmth of your love with those we encounter along life’s way.   Amen.

Thom Malcolm